Welcome to Sburb! (Dead and Over)

[Pappytech]

>Chas: You descend into a network of tunnels beneath the VILLAGE. Judging by the random stuff you see piled everywhere, it's probably a storage place.

As you walk through the tunnels, you suddenly come upon a large group of enemies, mostly IMPS, but it appears that they are being led by four BASILISKS. The IMPS are gathering up piles of SHINY THINGS.

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>Greg: The LS tells you that there are two other towers on this moon. He believes that they are inhabited, but has never actually visited them. He says that the White Queen might be able to answer your questions better.

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14:49:26

 

[WafflesandBacon]

>Xavier: Rescue the bird in a heroic fashion
You yell to thick brute, he looks over, you command him to let go of the bird, he denies.
Welp, you tried to be nice.


>STRIFE!
You SLASH and STAB the ORGES legs making him fall down. You then finish the job by STABBING the OGRE face.
The sweet sounds of motorized knife serenade the Land of Clouds and Feathers.

 

[senorcromas]

<spoiler=OOC> Okay, wow. I am really really sorry I couldn't post the last few days. I thought I would have internet. Not so, as it turned out.

>Rich: Deal With It.
Oh, please. This is nothing. NOTHING. You feel bad for the other players. Not everybody gets a freebee challenge. A TREADMILL? Ha!

O-okay, you didn't expect the speed to increase. Still, you mean, it could be WORSE. It could get FASTER. Like it is doing, apparently. No, no, this is pretty bad. How on Earth does you UNCLE do this? You're not entirely sure how much longer you can HANG ON. Any minute now, you're going to FALL humorously off the DREADMILL, and then you are doomed. Way to GO.

Just then, SPADEXSPRITE floats lazily down into the LIVING ROOM. The sight of the MONSTROSITY awakens the FIGHT OR FLIGHT INSTINCT within you. It appears as though your body has chosen FLIGHT. Sweet, sweet ADRENALINE pumps into your veins as you run frantically on the MACHINE, trying to get away from the ABOMINATION you created.

 

[Pappytech]

>Dirk:

Spoiler: Show Consortlog

-- iguanaElder [IE] began pestering stabsSalesman [SS] at 23:24 --
IE: Ah, thank you young lad!
IE: I fear those ruffians were planning to kill me.
SS: =]=> I'd certainly say so my bearded brother but they won't be doing that any time soon
SS: =]=> Or ever
SS: =]=> Since I killed them
IE: I'm glad to hear that.
IE: Those Underlings have been a menace to us for a long time now.
IE: Is there anything I can do to repay you?
SS: =]=> Well I'm set up pretty good right now I just came from the village on the other side of the gate
SS: =]=> But to satisfy my curiosity what were you doing out here to get caught
IE: Well, by sheer luck, I managed to find this cave yesterday.
IE: The markings down here have been so well preserved, I couldn't help but begin to study them!
IE: I had intended to go back to the camp and inform the other Elders of my discovery, but those Underlings must have been following me.
SS: =]=> Ah well you're in luck then
IE: Indeed.
SS: =]=> I spoke to the Elders just a while ago
SS: =]=> Their leader or something named me the Mentor of Time
IE: Wait, you're the hero?
SS: =]=> Yep
IE: But I thought that the Great Hero had already come!
IE: Didn't she jump off the giant pillar yesterday?
IE: Well, in any case, you have my graditude.
IE: Thank you.
SS: =]=> (Sorry chores in background)
IE: (Ah. gotcha.)
SS: =]=> (Just place this next part after those first two you said.)
SS: =]=> Yeah that'd be my sister
SS: =]=> She's pretty badass but I figure whoever's deciding all this knows what they're doing
IE: Huh. Well, alright then.
SS: =]=> If it makes you feel better I'm no slouch in kicking Underling ass
IE: Apparently not. It takes a skilled warrior to defeat a pair of Basilisks.
SS: =]=> Thanks but I guess one last question from me
IE: Yes?
SS: =]=> I'm heading to this Temple on this map here
SS: =]=> Would you know anything about it
IE: Oh, yes!
IE: Here, let me get you some better directions...
IE: Now, I feel I should warn you, you will face many enemies in the Temple.
SS: =]=> Thank you for your warning I figure I need to get right to work if I'm ever gonna stop the Black King though
SS: =]=> Thanks for the directions as well
IE: Yes, you're probably right.
IE: Well, I wish you the best of luck then.
SS: =]=> Can you get back to the gate on your own
SS: =]=> I can help you back if you need me to
IE: I should be fine. There probably won't be another patrol for a few hours.
SS: =]=> All right then in that case good luck
SS: =]=> Oh and tell the shopkeep that this HASTE ability is fantastic
IE: Oh, you already got a Fray-Motif?
IE: Good for you. I've heard that those are quite handy.
IE: Very well, I will pass on your message.
SS: =]=> All right thanks
IE: Good luck, Mentor. Be safe.
SS: =]=> You too Elder I'll probably stop by the village after I get through temple
IE: Very well. I hope to see you back at the camp then.
IE: Farewell.
-- iguanaElder [IE] ceased pestering stabsSalesman [SS] at 23:39 --

You follow the advice of both your PATRON TROLL and the ELDER IGUANA, and begin trekking across the desert to the MYSTERIOUS TEMPLE.

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>Xavier: You defeat the OGRE! Woo Hoo! +753 Build Grist, +673 Amber Grist.

The PARROT is quite grateful, and thanks you for saving him.

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>Chas: Your laser blasts bring down the roof, literally. One of the BASILISKS is crushed, but the other manages to escape the falling rocks. It begins randomly blasting fire around, causing severe damage to the IMPS.

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>Rich: Your adreniline boost allows you to keep running. As the CRUXTRUDER TIMER ticks down, you keep running and running.

Just before the timer hits zero, the TREADMILL begins to glow...

CLIMATIC FLASH OF LIGHT!

 

[CJ1145]

>Dirk: Trek across desert

Spoiler

Oh gog what is with all this sandy wind. That doesn't even look physically possible. And where did all this black soot come from, and more importantly why is it on your clothes? You ask these questions and more, each more stupid than the last, until at last you finally come to the TEMPLE. Shaking off the sand and soot you step inside and prepare for some serious ADVENTURING AND SPELUNKING.

 

[Pappytech]

>Chas: The second BASILISK puts up a fight, but you defeat it in the end. You do take some damage, however, lowering your HEALTH VIAL to 65%.

+3,957 Build Grist, +1,873 Chalk Grist, +968 Shale Grist, +481 Amber Grist, +329 Rust.

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>Dirk: You step into the TEMPLE FOYER. From your current posistion, there are three directions you can go: Straight, right, or left. Nothing really differentiates any of the directions from each other.

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>GM: Get fed up with timer nonsense. You decide to fast forward a few hours.

 

[CJ1145]

>Dirk: Go straight

Who the hell does this TEMPLE think you are? A man's direction if FORWARD, never faltering or straying from his chosen path! That and you're too lazy to turn right now after chugging through a DESERT. You'll check the other paths later, but right now you'll take the STRAIGHT ROUTE and see where it leads you.

 

[Pappytech]

>GM:Check in with one of the more inactive players: You focus in on one of the seven lands that make up this Medium, the Land of Dark and Life. On one of the few lighted patches of the planet, you can see a house/laboratory, you're not really sure which.

You observe the Land's sole human inhabitant, sitting in her workroom. She appears to be involved with one of her many inventions. Her Guardian is outside, exterminating any IMPS foolish enough to approach the house. However, the Guardian fails to notice a large, hulking silhouette, as it sneaks up behind the house.

You decide to follow this strange fellow, who you recognize to be the HERETIC BLUDGEONER, one of the Dark Kingdom's most fearsome Agents. He is infamous for his treatment of traitors to his kingdom, often eating their eyes and delivering an angry lecture down their sockets. Then he beats then to death with their own skulls. They die screaming that this doesn't seem physically possible.

HB sneaks into the house, clearly searching for something. After some scouting, he finds a hidden room. Upon his opening of it, you see the room contains an old and decrepit suit, one that seems very similar to the one worn by the girl's Guardian. You watch as HB picks up the suit, and sneaks back out of the house. But what's this? HB has been discovered by the girl! It seems that after finishing her work, she heard some strange noises and decided to investigate. A fatal mistake.

Some time later, the girl's Guardian enters the house. It is time for him to check on his charge, to reassure himself of her continued safety. Strange, she doesn't seem to be in her workroom, where could she... The Guardian sees something lying on the floor. Closer examination reveals it to be the girl, covered with a strange red liquid.

The Guardian notes the girl's limp nature, sees the wounds covering her frail body. Finally, he places a hand on her belly, searching for any signs of life. He finds nothing. Nothing at all.

Green sparks begin to rush up and down the Guardian's strange suit, the suit made for him by the dead girl he now holds in his arms. As it's creator's lifeblood pours out of her body, the suit begins releasing strange flows of green energy. It spreads across the Guardian's body, then the floor around him, then the entire house. The energy doesn't stop, until the entire planet is engulfed in its verdant tendrils. The energy then, for lack of a better phrase, fucks shit up.

In a single instant of glorious destruction, the Land of Dark and Life is no more, reduced to nothing but a few meteors, which are scattered across the Medium. One of these celestial nomads is flung away from all other Lands and planets, far away into the depths of Paradox Space. There, strange creatures probe the meteor, and discover its contents. They realize that this meteor could be the key to getting rid of a pair of unwanted guests, and pass it along to another, larger meteor. Sadly, this meteor is apparently from another universe, and it outside of your jurisdiction. If you want to figure out what's on it, you might want to ask someone else...

>GM: Be the other GM.

 

[ArcNitemare]

>Greg:Go to White Queen

You think on what this STRANGE MAN has told you.You wonder what is in these other towers.Some of your friends perhaps?After all you're here so why wouldn't they be?But you decide it may be wise to meet with this WHITE QUEEN.Maybe she will give you the answers you seek.

You ask him to take you to the WHITE QUEEN if he is willing to do so unless he has something more important to do.After all it would be rude to waste this STRANGE MAN'S time.

 

[WafflesandBacon]

> Xavier: Catch the parrot and teach TM Gust
No, you wouldn't do such and insulting and derogatory thing!

> Xavier: Ask the parrot questions
I do so.

 

[SamuelT]

>GM from another Universe: Suddenly appear

Okay, sure. We can do that. I'm sorry about not providing any visual aid for my appearance, I was a little pressed for time.

Right so, I should probably fill you in on what happened earlier, else you lot totally wouldn't get what's happening right now. Let me just get my notes on that and start at the beginning.

>GMFAU: Exposition

"Your name is LETAGE SONCUL, SIX AND A HALF SWEEP LONG, and you are currently resting in your RESPITEBLOCK AT THE SEA. It's one of the many in the RESPITECLUSTER where the population is mostely blueblooded. You positioned yourself just so we could see a few of your INTERESTS. Just out of the WINDOW you can see the back of your SEASHIP which you have gained through a massive victory in FLARP. Your RECUPERACOON is just in veiw, taking up MOST OF YOUR ROOM. On the wall is a POSTER of ONE OF YOUR FAVOURITE TV SHOWS, which you fangirl over whenever you can. Your AXE, which is your STRIFEKIND, is balanced just within reach, so you can-

Wait, who's this douchebag?

douchebag: be the douchebag it is you

Yeah, like that'll fucking happen. You can't do anything without this grubsuckers permission.

Alright she nods, you guess you can fucking explain now.

Your name is ILLIRE GANNER and you are a FUCKING SLAVE to this trollgirl. A long time ago you lived on the coasts of of TROLLCANADA, which was pretty fucking COLD BUT WHATEVER. You are a redblood, or rustblood as the slang is for the highbloods. You wear it as a BADGE OF HONOR though, as you think the HEMOSPECTRIC HIERARCHY is fucking DUMB. As you are at the LOWEST POINT OF SOCIETY you have PSYCHIC POWERS. You can COMMUNICATE WITH FAUNA, using them as extended limbs or WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT. This is also the reason you have FLORALKIND as your strife specibus.

The reason you are this seabloods slave is because of her and her fucking friends and her fucking FLARP SESSIONS. They were once raiding the RUSTBLOOD RESPITEBLOCK CLUSTER. They attacked and SLAUGHTERED most of your FRIENDS.

You flipped the fuck out and fought back. You were captured by LETAGE, with which you had dealings before, mostly over TROLLIAN. She took you AS A MANSERVANT and pretty much took away all your freedom. The freedom to play games, the freedom to steer plants, the freedom to fucking eat.

You do it anyway; you've killed your fair share of seabloods since you got here, and every time you were punished but it was totally worth it most of the time.


>douchebag: And back to the nookbiter again please.

GoGdAmN fiNE

>Letage: Expand on how you got into the current situation

<spoiler=Show Pesterlog>-- equilibricConcilate [EC] began trolling unopressedAgitator [UA] --
EC: \/ hey
UA: whAt thE fuck do you wANt
EC: \/ language
UA: yEAh ok whAt is it you wANt LEtAGE
EC: \/ ive found something i thought you might enjoy on the troll-internet
EC: \/ its a sort of game retrieved from some weird ruins
UA: whooptiE fuckiNG do
UA: im Not AllowEd to plAy GAmEs, you kNow thAt
EC: \/ well the thing is this game needs to be played with two or more players
EC: \/ so if i would want to play it you would be obliged to help me with it 8_^
UA: oh so this is ANothER fuckiNG sERvANt job
EC: \/ no i was doing this for you
UA: yEAh pREtty fuckiNG lAtE if you Ask mE
UA: but whAtEvER ill tAkE whAt i cAN GEt
EC: \/ ugh you are impossible sometimes
UA: I AM FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE?
UA: OK SCREW THIS YOU CAN JUST FUCKING TAKE CARE OF THIS YOUR FUCKING SELF
EC: \/ no wait stop
UA: FUCK YOU
EC: \/ Illire!
EC: \/ come back here
UA: uuuGh fuck
EC: \/ youre going to play this with me if you like it or not
EC: \/ i was doing this for you as a favour
EC: \/ but now were going to do this for me
UA: fiNE
UA: but why ARENt you doiNG this with youR othER sEAbloods
EC: \/ because i wanted to give you something as an apology
UA: cANt you just sEt mE fuckiNG fREE i would hEllA ApREciAtE thAt
EC: \/ you know i cant
UA: why thE hEll Not? =
EC: \/ because
EC: \/ becausee
EC: \/ i would lose face with the other bluebloods 8_8
UA: uhu RiGht
EC: \/ anyway i got a grubtop you can use right over there
UA: ok so whAts this GAmE likE
EC: \/ well the distributor of the game - sollux something - wasnt very specific
EC: \/ just that we had to build something most likely a house
UA: oh ok i cAN hANdlE thAt
EC: \/ good heres your disk
-- equilibricConcilate [EC] ceased pestering unopressedAgitator [UA]

And then-"

>GMFAU: Hasty interruption!

Right. Can do.

Whelp, I think that's enough for one time. Perhaps the other GM can take it over from here?

>GM: Take over again

 

[CJ1145]

>Dirk: Continue down straight path

Spoiler

What kind of insane place is this anyway? You feel like your perception is messed up, like everything is sort of SKEWED. You figure it's probably your imagination. Still, the ART on the walls is rather intriguing. You decide to explore further and make your way down the STRAIGHT PATH.

>CJ: Behold GMFAU's post.

Spoiler

Oh, wow.

Spoiler

That is some REALLY GOOD ART. Too good, in fact. Why am I even up here in my little enclave making these shitty pictures anyway? It's not like anything of worth is added that I couldn't have just typed. Sometimes I wonder if I should just end it all.

Spoiler

Wait, what? What do you mean what do I mean? I'm saying sometimes I just feel like I should just save myself the work and not make all these doodles to go with my posts. What did you think I meant?

Whatever, it's not important. Just... go away for now, I have some style refinement to do. By which I mean sit around reading TVTropes until it's my turn to post again, then I'll hastily draw something that looks like a little less effort went into it than the last doodle and stick on top of whatever I'm doing.

Spoiler: OOC

What Sburb RP is complete without a little Hussie-style self insertion?

 

[Pappytech]

>Dirk: Going straight takes you to a room with a passage straight ahead and to the left, and a locked door to the right. There are a few IMPS in the room, who attack you once you enter. In the middle of the floor is a MYSTERIOUS TILE.

In addition, your SELF-INSERTION earns a few chuckles from a God Monster.

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>Greg: The LS agrees to take you to the WQ, and asks you to follow him. He walks over to a window, where a GRAPPLING HOOK is hanging. He grabs the rope tied onto the GRAPPLING HOOK, and begins to climb down.

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>Chas: You find some PILES OF ROCKS, RUMPLED HEAD COVERINGS, and a few packs of RATIONS. When you emerge from the TUNNELS, you see that thanks to some help from Dash Overcoat and Ace Tailspin, the fires are nearly put out. Looks like that'll all be taken care of in a few more minutes.

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>Xavier:

Spoiler: Show Consortlog

-- parrotConsort [PC] began pestering lionizedAnon [LA] at 12:04 --
PC: You saved me!
LA: Yes.
PC: Thank you thank you thank you!
LA: No problem.
PC: Is there anything I can do to thank you?
LA: Um...
LA: You can tell something about this place?
PC: Sure! What would you like to know?
LA: ...
LA: Why are you a parrot?
PC: I was hatched a parrot.
LA: Ah.
LA: That was dumb question.
PC: Yes. Yes it was.
LA: Are you the only one here?
PC: Nope!
LA: Awesome!
LA: There's more?
PC: Yes.
LA: Also awesome!
PC: I know!
LA: Can you take me to them?
PC: Um...
PC: Can you fly?
LA: No...'
PC: In that case, I don't think so.
LA: Darn.
PC: We typically gather on the upper clouds.
LA: Wow.
PC: Sorry.
LA: Maybe I can alchemize something...
PC: What's alchemize?
LA: Long story, I hardely know myself.
PC: Wait, I just got an idea!
LA: Do tell!
PC: Let me see if I can find some more of my friends; we might be able to carry you up!
LA: Okey doke!
PC: Okay! I'll be back later.
PC: Wait here.
-- parrotConsort [PC] ceased pestering lionizedAnon [LA] at 12:10 --

The PARROT flies off, but soon returns with a few others. They're each holding a rope, which when tied together form a HARNESS. They ask you to get in.

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Spoiler: OOC

Alright, I'm going to be offline for a couple days. Moving back home for a couple weeks. I should hopefully be back Wednesday night, assuming I don't die in a horrible crash or something. Sorry.

 

[WafflesandBacon]

> Fly away now!
I fly with the parrots
Fly away! Fly awaaaaaaaay!

> ===>
I down upon the land, and become overwhelmed with beauty.

 

[Connor Lonske]

>what you doin' bro, there's fuckers everywhere11111

...

>bro, come on, wake up1

...

>bro, wake up111

AH, what! Oh shit, you have been sleeping a long time haven't you!? Man, you can't remember what you did, but you think in your dream you must of been drunk as hell! You look out your window and see a lot of imps around your building. Their going around to the side of your home, but you can't see where they are going. You step away from the window and check you inventory.

Level 5 clothing; WH 7
Omnitool; WH 1
One star Agency Club; WH 4.5
Deck of unused cards; WH 2
Item_set=Punched Cards; WH 0
Item_set=Item Cards; WH 0

16.5 out of 35

OK, now wha-BAM!

>check that out bro1

You hear the gunshot, sounds very loud. You look out you window, and BAMB! Bunch of imps get blasted away out your window. Man, it must be your dad with his shot gun! OK, now what?

>go outside.

OK, you head for the door of your apartment to find it is locked up from the inside. Good thing your inside! You open the door. WAIT!

>what/

You forgot your keys again! Damn it! Well, no turning back now. You head down stairs.

 

[CJ1145]

>Dirk: Decimate

You DESTROY THE IMPS. This isn't even worth a doodle, it's just too quick. You don't even bother to check the GM if you won the STRIFE at this point. Instead you go and check out that TILE. This certainly seems to have PUZZLE ELEMENTS involved. You carefully reach out and push the TILE down to see what happens.

 

[ArcNitemare]

>Greg:Follow LS

You watch as this STRANGE MAN,who you will now refer to as LS for convenience,walks over to a window.He grabs the rope from a grappling hook that is hanging from the window and,as he starts to climb down,motions you to follow him.

You shrug and do as he asks.

You try very hard not to look down as you climb.